DALL-E created image of an Onion at a Parisian fle market

Docteur Bizarre

 : 1456 words

This is a story that starts in Paris and ends in Regency era England.

My wife and I recently returned from a trip to London and Paris. During our visit, we explored the renowned Les Puces de Saint-Ouen flea market in Paris. It is a maze of booths and buildings of booths with hundreds of vendors selling everything.

We find a stall with a selection of books priced at €1. One particular book caught my eye as there is a face of an onion-headed man (🧅👨) staring right at me. The book is in French. I can neither read nor speak French. I had to have THIS BOOK.

The entire transaction turned into an adventure as I only had 10 quid on me. I had to find the owner of the stall, who immediately referred me to someone that spoke English. I tried give him £10 for the book, but he gave me directions where I could exchange Pounds for Euros.

I do not blame him. If someone offered me Candian Dollars or Pesos, even if it were 10X the value, I would decline. I then tried to use an ATM, but it did not work with American networks. Finally we decided to find the currency exchange that the Frenchman had recommended and get Euros. I do not remember how far away it was, but it was much further then we were lead to believe. I was able to exchange the £10 for €10 and something (I know, not a great rate, but I needed this book).

Finding our our way back and discovering no one was at the shop, I left the €10 on a table and left with the book, which he had set aside. He was across the way at a cafe and I tried to just say keep the Euros, but he gave me change, of which he did not have exact change and by the end I only paid half a Euro. I want to humbly thank this unkown French man for being helpful. Although next time just take the tourist's money.

Docteur Bizarre: Science-Fantasy Book by Jack Vance

At this point I must show the cover. I am sure that the cover is already visible. This is the cover and the very first page of Docteur Bizarre by Jack Vance.

Onion headed main cover of the book Docteur Bizarre

The cover states, according to Google Translate:

The relic came stealthily from the rock. A skinny creature, emaciated, with tormented eyes. It moved in a series of rapid jerks.

First of all, that onion-headed man (🧅👨) does not look emaciated. Nor does he have tormented eyes. It casts doubt over the rest of the book, which I cannot confirm, from the aforementioned French.


I recently started using ChatGPT to create the featured images for some of my posts. I usually just let it start with an image and then based on that image I will have it refine and focus in on specific things until I get an image I think represents the abstract idea of my post. This process takes a dozen or so iterations for something that I want to use emerges.

Here is that process for Docteur Bizarre. Portions of the conversation have been edited that add nothing. ChatGPT can be very dull and uninspired. Although I have left in my many grammar mistakes.

I need a cover for a book. The book will be in French and named Docteur Bizarre. It needs an image of a man that has an onion as his head. This head is coming up out of a barren landscape. The man is smiling.
Here is the cover for your book, "Docteur Bizarre".
The man does not have a body. It is from his neck up that is coming out of the ground. The man also has ears.There are weird statues in the background
The revised cover for your book "Docteur Bizarre" is ready.
The man needs to face forward. Can you also mock up what it would look like as a book with the title?
Your book cover for "Docteur Bizarre" with the title included is now presented.

I have redacted a portion here in which I ask ChatGPT to write the first chapter. Nothing really came out of this other than a new, exciting book cover.

Does this change what the cover would look like with this extra information contained in chapter 1? Can you give me the updated cover?
The updated cover for "Docteur Bizarre" is now available, reflecting the mood and elements from the first chapter.
Can you incorporate one more detail? Let's say the book was written in the late 1980's as pulpy paperback.
The revised cover for "Docteur Bizarre" now has a style reminiscent of a late 1980's pulp paperback.

More redactions around a conversation about turning the book into a movie. ChatGPT writes very uninspired creative works, so I did not include that portion here.

Can you give me a poster that uses these influences (Author's note: David Lynch) listed and is based on the book Docteur Bizarre?
The movie poster inspired by the themes of the novel "Docteur Bizarre" and influenced by the aesthetic of 1980s mystery and psychological thrillers is ready.
Ok, so let's imagine that Docteur Bizarre is Mr Darcy from Pride and Prejudice. What would an interaction between Docteur Bizarre(Mr Darcy) and Elizabeth Bennet?

Imagining Docteur Bizarre as Mr. Darcy from "Pride and Prejudice," his unique characteristics would certainly add a whimsical layer to the classic tale. Here's a scene where Docteur Bizarre, in the guise of Mr. Darcy, interacts with Elizabeth Bennet:

The grand ball at Netherfield was a spectacle of light and sound, with the gentry of Hertfordshire gathered in their finest attire. Amidst the swirl of silks and satins, Elizabeth Bennet's eyes found their curious subject across the room: Mr. Darcy—though in this peculiar world, he was known as Docteur Bizarre, an enigmatic gentleman with a head shaped like an onion.

He stood apart from the dancing and merriment, his gaze intense and yet distant, as if his thoughts lingered elsewhere. Elizabeth approached, her curiosity piqued by the odd gentleman who had caused so much stir in their community.

Elizabeth Bennet: Mr. Darcy, you seem most contemplative this evening. Is the assembly not to your liking? Docteur Bizarre (Mr. Darcy): Miss Bennet, you mistake me. I am merely... unaccustomed to such lively company. His voice was smooth, the onion layers shifting slightly with each word, as if his emotions were close to the surface. Elizabeth Bennet: (laughing lightly) Sir, I imagine our country manners quite differ from those of London society. Perhaps they are too... pungent for your taste? Docteur Bizarre (Mr. Darcy): On the contrary, I find there is much to be admired here—particularly the candor for which you are so celebrated. Elizabeth met his gaze, noting the layers of meaning in his words and the peculiar scent of sincerity. Elizabeth Bennet: You flatter me, Mr. Darcy. But I wonder, does your unique... constitution grant you insight into the character of those you meet? Docteur Bizarre (Mr. Darcy): Indeed, Miss Bennet. One might say, I have an ability to peel away the superficial layers of society. A playful sparkle lit Elizabeth's eyes. Elizabeth Bennet: Then, Mr. Darcy, perhaps you shall uncover that beneath the propriety, we are all but humble bulbs in the garden of life, striving towards the light. Docteur Bizarre (Mr. Darcy): (chuckling softly) A most... enlightened observation. Their conversation was cut short by the call for the next dance, but the exchange lingered with them both. As the evening wore on, Elizabeth found her thoughts returning to the strange yet compelling Docteur Bizarre, whose onion-head bore a remarkable resemblance to the depth and complexities of the heart.

In this whimsical adaptation, the essence of the characters is preserved while allowing for a playful interlude that bridges Austen's world with the surreal charm of Docteur Bizarre.

Can you revise the cover of the prestige show to include the fact that it is an adaption of Pride and Prejudice?
The revised cover art for the prestige television show, which is an adaptation of "Docteur Bizarre" within the context of "Pride and Prejudice," is now ready. It reflects the unique blend of these two narratives.

I would watch the BBC adaptation of this on Netflix.

I will admit I was not ready for the onion puns (punion?).

Perhaps they are too... pungent for your taste?
-Elizabeth Bennet: Paraphilia NOS
I have an ability to peel away the superficial layers of society.
-Docteur Bizarre (Mr. Darcy): 🧅

Nor was I ready for Mr. Darcy's appearance.

I have nothing else to add.

comments powered by Disqus